Friday, October 30, 2009

Smoked Goose

[OldF] Niteowl: damnit you left the server
greens: I was starving
greens: that fucking goose didn't cut it
[OldF] Niteowl: fucking a goose almost never satisfies your hunger
[OldF] Niteowl: except from goose lust, of course
greens: now you tell me
greens: heading back in though
greens: plus, i really need to go shopping. All I have left in the house is bourbon and uncooked rice.
[OldF] Niteowl: so..
[OldF] Niteowl: why do you have to go shopping again?
greens: dick
[OldF] Niteowl: hahahah
greens: WHILE I was messaging
[OldF] Niteowl: i'd feel guilty, but yer a pretty devious sonuvabitch yerself
greens: massagin myself
greens: that shouldn't enter into it
[OldF] Niteowl: what shouldn't enter who now?
greens: the skin bus shouldn't enter tuna town without paying the proper toll
greens: if you get my drift
[OldF] Niteowl: is that a legal binding matrimonial agreement?
greens: it's what we all come to realize

MMO : Monster Mineral Obliteraion

spruce: I don't know. I also read somewhere that Lineage had definite power structures and that Korean players liked that aspect. Like someone could play a prince and everyone else had to obey him
spruce: which is so different from over here, where everyone has to be the special snowflake
betaray: the corp part of Eve seems to be like that, but that game is basically a grind fest too
betaray: just you don't actually do anything, you just shoot a beam at a space rock and then spend 15 minutes flying home
betaray: the space rock doesn't even fight back

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Co-op Isnt' THAT Great.

chrisd: i DO really want to play some borderlands together. maybe my gf can go have an affair so I have some free time.

Metafilter : Limits To Open Mindedness

JDHarper: MeFi is such a liberal, ecofriendly place, but don't you DARE touch their dryers
spruce: or be a fatty

Performance Reports Have NO PLace In TV

cheesoning: or House. Doesn't matter that they're batting .900 on solving cases/medical mysteries, they're still right on the edge of losing their job.

Brilliant, But Late Idea

liquidindian: They should do a show about someone that's shit at their job, but has a positive attitude towards authority.
betaray: the office

Arousingly Confusing

betaray: [11:01:48] itchy: betaray seemed to think he was in the market
[11:10:06] chrisd: i think beta and itchy and elham went in on one.

betaray: that's a confusing exchange

Castle To House To Gazebo To Porn, Naturally.

JDHarper: Castle is like house but in a police station
cheesoning: yes. I'm not a house fan, either.
liquidindian: We need more eponymous characters named after domiciles.
liquidindian: We could have a fireman called Cottage.
ralph: a bum called Box
JDHarper: Park Ranger Wigwam
cheesoning: yeah, or a lawyer show with Shanty McHovel
cheesoning: (He's not a very good lawyer)
JDHarper: He's a pirate lawyer
liquidindian: How about a lawyer that only takes pro bono cases called John Soupkitchen.
Katya: A grizzled old police detective named Shack
cheesoning: An underwater welder named sharkcage
Katya: And the adorable immigrant fruit salesman, Gazebo
cheesoning: *cues the laugh track
Katya: that would be on tshirts across the nation
liquidindian: The show could be called It's Gazebo!
Katya: Look out guys, here comes Gazebo!
cheesoning: Man, did I get the squirts from that melon. OH GAZEBO!
Katya: Sigh, once again, I get passed up for a promotion due to affirmative action. Damn that Gazebo!
liquidindian: He has a very strict and strait-laced boss called Ed Shed.
liquidindian: Actually, Ed Shed would be the person who gets Gazebo into his unlikely capers.
bigjimslade: the conjoined twin neighbors, Bob and Bill Slitlevel
cheesoning: hot
bigjimslade: Splitlevel, that should be
cheesoning: oh.
bigjimslade: the typo is more for the TV Characters Named After Porn Camera Angles

Tone is SO Important

JDHarper: I just discovered Castle a couple weeks ago
JDHarper: But it is AWESOME.
cheesoning: my wife likes it.

Hey, The Russian Military Were WORLD Class.

itchy: honestly, how does anyone do ANYTHING after polishing off a bottle of vodka?

Good Ol' John Walker

liquidindian: Did I mention that John Walker loved DragonAge?
Niteowl: oh good
liquidindian: I think he gave it 94.
Niteowl: good ol' Jimmy Walker
Niteowl: love that.. guy. yeah. he's. uh. good at .. reviewing games?
Niteowl: brewing heady yet respectable micro-stouts?
liquidindian: He's one of the RPS peeps.
Niteowl: directing avant guarde films depicting brocolli and mayonaise?
Niteowl: dealing with split ends?
Niteowl: taking over the phone and listening to your mother-in-law talk and talk and talk and atlk and in the end get out of her her well guarded gingerbread recipe?
liquidindian: What are you blethering about?
Niteowl: playing Twister at a nationally competitive level?
Niteowl: oh, i see, he's one of the RPS peeps
Niteowl: sorry, too busy blathering there to read
liquidindian: You imbecile.

I Imagine

bigjimslade: you mean you guys don't enter your actual birthdays?
bigjimslade: frauds
itchy: why do they bother
itchy: it's easier to watch porn than game videos
itchy: I IMAGINE
JDHarper: Gametrailers! I *just told you* when was born, stop asking!
JDHarper: Use one of 'em fancy internet cookies
itchy: but how do they know it's you and not your impressionable schizo little brother?
Niteowl: the sweaty palms
liquidindian: We need a jaded resignation detector in webcams, to allow us adults to view any content.
itchy: i like your idea liquid, but perhaps you could throw in a little AI for that experience "It appears you would like to watch porn ... here, let me pull something up for you."
liquidindian: Maybe it could also load up something to take the edge off the post-porn self-loathing.
liquidindian: After, um, detecting that porn is no longer needed.
itchy: or it could just deter you altogether by playing back a little live video of yourself in the corner of the screen
itchy: saddest video evar
itchy: I IMAGINE
Niteowl: you keep using the word 'imagine' i do not think it means what you thnk it means
Niteowl: to wit, it's not a synonym for 'i recall'

Not Quite As Threatening.

betaray: plus fuck for profit medicine and medical patents
***betaray transforms into betahulk, some one must have made him indignant, you won't like him when he's indignant

Monday, October 26, 2009

That's When We Know The Battle is Won

Katya: oh man persepolis is on. I looove this movie
spruce: you just love watching women get oppressed
Cyrano: no. that's me.
Katya: i wish it was me!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

A Mile in Your Moccasins

niteowl: gojira doesn't seem terribly melodic, cheesoning
cheesoning: yeah, but did you hear that kick drum. Holy fuck.
niteowl: god... is he doing that with his fucking foot?
cheesoning: two feet, but still.
niteowl: man, it's funny how we listen for completely different things
niteowl: yes, this is much more enjoyable if i just listen to the drumming
cheesoning: :) welcome to my world.
niteowl: there's cheese and bratwurst everywhere!
cheesoning: why "Oh Nooo"?
niteowl: good point

That South Park Episode Was Hilarious

Cyrano: no urge and no libido? not exact normal and probably not healthy for an extended time.
niteowl: dude
niteowl: if ppl want to play WoW, who are you to call them 'not healthy'

Just Schedule An X-Ray

fauxreal: what is up people?
cheesoning: depends on their proclivity, I suppose.

Depends If You Are Talking Cloves or "Cloves"

niteowl: if i were to prescribe to a jaunty liberal artsy periodical to further my personal development
niteowl: should i go with the New Yorker or The Atlantic
cheesoning: you're already here, pal.
Cyrano: wouldn't a beret and a pack of cloves be cheaper?

Fecal Matter And Dead Bird Blend Fantastically

Katya: i decided 10 hours of travel each way was too much for me for one day
ralph: sorry you won't be there
ralph: we need someone who smells good
ralph: burden's gonna be on Hicks, again

Valid Rebuttal

niteowl: Katya: look at the l4d2 thread
Katya: dude i don't want to have to read thorugh an entire thread!
niteowl: just read the last two lines!
Katya: read my butt

Strong Opinions

Katya: anyone else love strangers with candy?
gordonfrohman: it was okay
Katya: you suck
Katya: it was hilarious

Wait, I Miss!?

ralph: you know how niteowl's rants are kinda hit or miss?
ralph: this is a huge hit
ralph: "I'm as patient as a Marlboro-encrusted beer-stained soul-bereft shell of a man waiting in a jury rigged conglomeratino of bungie cords and duct-tape outside Lindsay Lohan's house. You're Lindsay in this scenario. The camera is the replacement filter. And the bungie cords just feel nice."
niteowl: dude, i'm a thanks whore
niteowl: i do what i do to get what i need
niteowl: there's a rolling stones song somewhere in there

I've Never Met A Friend I Didn't Hate. Instantly.

gordonfrohman: I stupidly friended people I don't know recently
chundo: didn't we learn a valuable lesson about that awhile back?
gordonfrohman: yes, we did
niteowl: wow, friended MORE ppl? you are oddly welcoming to new people for such an ascetic
gordonfrohman: well I hate them instantly
niteowl: consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds gordonfrohman
niteowl: and misanthropes
niteowl: and, maybe, world class athletes
niteowl: and towering titans of the industry


gordonfrohman: what's your e-mail again?
chundo: EMAIL LINK
chundo: and this time NO GAY PORN, niteowl!
***bigjimslade sees that as a thumbs-up for him, though
niteowl: THIS time? those were tasteful videos
niteowl: of hot firemen doing what hot firemen do
niteowl: put out fires
niteowl: WRT to fire safety
niteowl: unless they are trained in defibrillators and industrial first aid, which they do a lot of training in
niteowl: but nothing can train their UNTAMED LUST
niteowl: of fire retardant gear
niteowl: which i'd love to RIP off with my TEETH
niteowl: if i were quadripelegic and needed to remove it, and some corrosive acid that may have spilled on it
niteowl: etc etc etc

More Advice

ralph: if you want advice twig, just ask
Niteowl: lead with the beard
stresstwig: i'm waiting for our road trip
ralph: dry hump them silly pretty much covers it
stresstwig: to ask all of the growing up questions
stresstwig: "I've got hair in weird places"
stresstwig: like my basement, covered in blood
stresstwig: / niteowl response

Head For Details

Niteowl: you don't like my music choices iambic pentameter man ( stresstwig )?
stresstwig: i just have a hard time reconciling a western canadian gentle coding man of asian descent who likes his computers quiet, his rooms cool and his children in adorable pictures and dragonforce
stresstwig: (did i do a good niteowl impersonation there)
Niteowl: that wasn't bad, actually

College Advice

stresstwig: did you also have a female friend who you were desperately in love with
stresstwig: so like
stresstwig: when you both had a paper due
stresstwig: you would go to her dorm fresh from the vending machine
stresstwig: with snickers
stresstwig: and offer your support
ralph: wearing his college sweater?
stresstwig: tell her she could always talk to you, and that she could totally write this paper on plato
Niteowl: naw, naw, i just dry humped them silly

Except Maybe Censorship

Niteowl: sweet, i got some soundgarden and DRAGONFORCE on my ipod
Niteowl: my transit ride home is going to ROCK THE FUCK OUT
stresstwig: are you...serious
stresstwig: i guess that's why you didn't type the f there
betaray: he's the spoon man
betaray: no rusty cage will hold him

Only Slightly Better Than Yahoo! Answers

Niteowl: you can't die from procastination, can you?
stresstwig: are you procrastinating from eating, drinking water, or going to the bathroom
stresstwig: or procrastinating from going to the er to get a pole removed from your brain

Yin and Yang

Niteowl: i'm extremely wholesome to the opposite sex, and in general. amongst friends, not so much
Niteowl: so my entire dorm floor knew me as you know me
Niteowl: utterly, irredeemly filthy to the point of them scratching out their ear drums
Niteowl: everyone else, i'm the goddamn Beav
stresstwig: that would explain your love of dragon force
Niteowl: my floor would constantly try and bait me into saying something disgusting about, say, shaved squirrels and impacted bowels
Niteowl: i just never saw those two sides as exclusive of each other
stresstwig: the squirrels and the bowels?
Niteowl: the disgusting and the polite
Niteowl: like free-form laureate and gainful employment
Niteowl: no, wait, NOT like that
stresstwig: so you're kind of like dexter
Niteowl: i guess, yes, possibly, except my extremes aren't so extreme
Niteowl: maybe the red headed dude from That 70's Show and say, DeVito from Taxi
ralph: or Mike Seaver and the slutty Golden Girl
stresstwig: i'm trying to figure out which guy from that 70's show you are talking about
stresstwig: donna?


Katya: especially since i need to get a dress for my friend's wedding on halloween
Katya: he wants people to dress in renn faire costumes but its not necessary
Katya: which means im not gonna


niteowl: both KF and BL are going to fulfillthat sweet spot for me. non-combative, non-competitve, killing fun
niteowl: fuck my canadian + asianness
niteowl: swear to god, THIS close to 'collaborative fingerpaiinting'

Software Gods Care Not For Your Puny Genres

cheesoning: but sometimes the matching software gets it wrong
cheesoning: so, instead of the real Big Drag - Track 11, I get the music to La Marihuana, by Oscar Chavez.
cheesoning: no idea what triggered a match there, but so be it.
cheesoning: La Marihuana is a GREAT song.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Like Objectivism, The Perfect Cover For Douchebaggery

Katya: im not gonna say something im obviously gonna
Katya: its ok that i say it that way yknow?
niteowl: wha?
betaray: look katya I could be a dick and say something like, STFU
stresstwig: what
betaray: I could be condescending and say, stresstwig get a clue
betaray: this is the perfect cover
stresstwig: what
betaray: I could totally ignore that and be all...
Katya: ok
Katya: i could be a bitch and tell betaray that he's a fucking cock that should die in a fire, but I 'm not gonna
Katya: instead I'll just say he's a cock

Low Brow Counter

ralph: there's another guy, David something, friends with them
ralph: and with sarah vowell
JDHarper: Hasslehoff

Let's Not Get It Started

itchy: the black eyed peas new album is called "THE END" ... we can only hope


fauxreal: you have 4 times the thaks of me niteowl
niteowl: i prolly post ten times more than you, though
niteowl: ppl would thank you, but theyfirst have to go to wikipedia, then ask their summa cum laude uncle, then cross references it with a Frontline episode they think they saw once, and by the time they have unraveled your Gordian knot of humour and references, they've closed the browser and went to bed. ralph doesn't have to do any of that, of course, but he's just a lazy fuck.

Close But No Cigar

niteowl: oh damn, wtf
niteowl: srpuce's shake monster only got 2.11 out of 5
niteowl: THE EEDIOTS
cheesoning: I put it on my facebook page and got multiple comments about the term "Niggurath"
cheesoning: not saying my readership is the most enlightened, but I think the title might be putting people off.
betaray: They're probably all niggardly as well
cheesoning: exactly.
chrisd: burn them on a pyre of faggots
cheesoning: yeah, the assholes. Er...

Saw, The Game : Stay On Topic Please.

cheesoning: any redeeming values at all?
stresstwig: I think the convoluted plots and traps are hilarious
stresstwig: also has cary elwes overacting
cheesoning: oh, hey - anyone know any hacks for Animal Crossing?

Fanboy + Cynicism

cheesoning: I feel like there are companies out there who "get it", but they are the exception.
stresstwig: what the fuck
stresstwig: that's some bullshit right there
cheesoning: Valve gets it
chrisd: yeah... end of list

Licensed Games

stresstwig: oh my god the saw game came out
cheesoning: what's that about?
stresstwig: i have no clue
stresstwig: i cant imagine that movie being a game
stresstwig: i wonder if you play a dude who is put in a trap
cheesoning: lumberjacks, probably
chrisd: you flail wildly at your keyboard for five minutes then it kills you?

Food Is Not Love

cheesoning: man, they had some party store showing costumes on WGN morning news (local) and they were all stripper versions of things
Katya: yeah its terrible
cheesoning: nurse stripper, vampire stripper, etc.
cheesoning: but morning tv!
stresstwig: stripper stripper
Katya: skeleton stripper
cheesoning: yeah, that one was hot
cheesoning: paint stripper
stresstwig: sexy refrigerator


stresstwig: this l4d2 trailer makes me wonder two things
cheesoning: why there's no stripper zombie?
stresstwig: whether or not them seeing the helicopters not rescuing them is going to be seen as poor taste in reference to new orleans
stresstwig: and why the spitter has such pronounced nipples


chrisd: wow, ctrl-[number] takes you to THAT number tab.
chrisd: in ffx
chrisd: stress, those are important issues.
stresstwig: i know! lost sleep already.

Tips, From Absurd To Obscene

Niteowl: WHAT DO I DO?
Niteowl: wear the Rooster Hat
stresstwig: you....go to the meeting?
Niteowl: i mean. the rooster hat i allegedly have
cheesoning: can you get your hands on some coffee or Red Bull right now?
JDHarper: How about spelunky? You can bring a laptop and play spelunky the whole time
Niteowl: no, i don't think i can
stresstwig: just go naked
stresstwig: then you can play spelunky
betaray: naked spelunky is bliss
Niteowl: TMI TMI TMI
cheesoning: you still here?
stresstwig: it takes time for him to strip
stresstwig: first he has to cover himself in pigs blood
cheesoning: wtf.
cheesoning: pigs are unclean.
cheesoning: looks like someone needs a re-indoctrination.
chrisd: it's so that nobody can see the OTHER peoples blood he's about to release
stresstwig: once you're already covered in blood, the mindless slaughtering rates lower on the shock scale
stresstwig: "Like i've never seen that before"
cheesoning: also, "Foiling up, coach!"

Gentlemanly Combat

gordonfrohman: I dunno. I really need something with a good story, but I can't think of anything that will pull you out of a good story more than turn-based combat
gordonfrohman: PREPARE TO DIE!!!! .... uh, well, prepare to die when it's my turn.

You Need To Get An Expansion Book For It

Katya: zomp ran an onlien game for you guys?
gordonfrohman: y'all in here might enjoy it. zomp even illustrated it
bigjimslade: a couple
bigjimslade: but yeah that one was excellent
bigjimslade: LINK
Katya: that doesn't sound canon

Rage Against The Machine

gordonfrohman: oh wait, I was a dwarf-theif
chrisd: class "temp"
Katya: how long ago was this
gordonfrohman: years and years
stresstwig: zompist sounds all young and punkish
stresstwig: like he's about to go break into some vending machines

Not A Reference To GLBT

niteowl: also, best candy ad campaign?
niteowl: Skittles
betaray: they are edgy
betaray: you gotta be hardc0re to taste the rainbow

Mount & Blade : Don't Get Cocky, Kid

Faux Real: Lord Gareth knocked unconscious by Swandian recruit
gordonfrohman: oh snap faux
gordonfrohman: that recruit must be stoked
niteowl: yeah, for sure, you know on next Camp, he's gonna be doing a Rocky Training montage
gordonfrohman: or he'll wind up left on some battlefield with horse tracks on his face

Somebody Has To Validate Freud

betaray: that's one scary looking pumpkin vagina
ralph: it's part of an ancient race of hunting warrior vaginas
ralph: wait till you see the mother one
ralph: other one*
ralph: whoops

Don't. Question. The Process. Also Tentacles.

ralph: hey niteowl, you failed to RD my rant against fake computers
ralph: you went straight to katya crapping
ralph: again
ralph: get off the stick or we'll give your job to the mexican
niteowl: what can i say man, the game is the game, try harder, stop phoning it in, drop the references to day time dramas from 1979, lose the stache, retrofit a real bumper on that statusUV, burn your moleskine, make chintzy 60's era pleather couches from your law texts, host a slam poetry session where the mic doesn't work, take up the butterfly stroke, stop opening your balisong with two hands, stop worrying so much about your lower back, read less alcoholic white men from days when orange and brown were 'complementary colours', chew an altoid, impersonate Lipton, have more than one favourite swear word, have one favorite swear phrase, creep out a car dealer, go for broke
ralph: stop worrying so much about your lower back
ralph: that one hit home
ralph: the rest have me pretty comfortable that my net persona is untraceable
niteowl: yer saying yer net persona is not yer real persona? what are you? 21?
ralph: and the suv is 12 years old
niteowl: 12 years old eh? 5 more years and you could a called it 'vintage'
niteowl: i bet you do it anyhow, Cobain
ralph: the vintage threshhold is 17?
niteowl: i dunno, you tell me, hipster
niteowl: HUGS
ralph: heh
niteowl: i'm writing yer name out in Lite Brite as we speak
ralph: hug beta he's closer
niteowl: naw, he tries to practice his 'scissors' technique
niteowl: and my pucker reflex is mad strong
ralph: you do know that neither you nor beta have tentacles, and you're both dudes
niteowl: wait. what?

Lone Gunmen Usually Aren't.

Katya: they are doing a fucking cross over of "fast money" and "mad money"
Katya: on cnbc right now. they called it a voltron of financial news
Katya: if you don't hear from me again, know that I love you all

We've Solved Our Energy Crisis

liquidindian: The best thing about the term 'Angry Internet Man' is that Angry Internet Men get angry at the use of the term 'Angry Internet Man'.

Stalin Hated Cowboys

betaray: boy howdy!
betaray: I'm surprised it wasn't confiscated at the border

Foreboding Anger

cheesoning: Valve seems pretty against consoles
cheesoning: I'll stick with them
gordonfrohman: the community will get what it wants
niteowl: that sounds foreboding
gordonfrohman: I was slowly sharpening a knife when I said that for added effect
Katya: your mom will get what she wants
niteowl: but that's a no brainer, Katya, my mom is a dominatrix
niteowl: easy there, Angry Internet Man, you don't want to sharpen too much, you might get short of breath, have another Twinkie

You Can't Filter Freedom

Katya: that person doesn't like to give much away
cheesoning: the one time I wish my work Internets would filter content...

Ron Paul Is Slim Pickings

betaray: only 49 females with profile pics
betaray: the 605 dudes are going to have to fight
cheesoning: Atlas Shrugged.
Faux Real: jesus wept.
cheesoning: that's a biker chick
cheesoning: "weight: I'll tell you later"

Muting Is, Good, Apparently.

Cyrano: it's like getting jerked off by an angel...
Cyrano: (they use the wings to tickle your taint)

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Henson Would NOT Approve

cheesoning: it's long, but it's worth it
liquidindian: I'll get to it once I've finished watching Loose Change.
liquidindian: Damn. Thought that would get a response.
liquidindian: Guess you're wise to me.
Faux Real: internet is like a boxing glove to your shock jock ways
Faux Real: find a different way to make the puppets dance


Katya: glad Bush is keepin it classy
betaray: wow it's right in my back yard
betaray: I should go and give you all a report
cheesoning: you should clean your scope

Sarcasm, The Third Eye

gordonfrohman: that's why we went to war. God told him we needed to wipe out the religious zealots
gordonfrohman: I think maybe God was being sarcastic but W didn't pick up on it

More Damacy

Katya: well a serial killer who played katamari damacy though would have to be one who smashed people with gigantic balls
gordonfrohman: no comment

Tamara Lowe

cheesoning: holy shit! Tamara Lowe?!
Katya: YEAH
Cyrano: I'm guessing there'll be a lot of flag pins at that conference.
cheesoning: I would like to hear what W might possibly have to say.
cheesoning: "Maybe hold off on your 'Mission Accomplished' banner..."
cheesoning: "No matter how good you look in a jumpsuit."
Katya: haah these pics are pricedless
Katya: priceless
Katya: the hair will destroy us all

Easy Legolas

greenskpr: Gotta clean the house. Later fagolas.
greenskpr left the room.


cheesoning: yeah, it's easier to blame an object than a faulty mental state
betaray: what do you mean? It's clearly either people are evil or objects are evil, nothing to do with the frailty of human psyche...
cheesoning: I always wished that some serial killer would be caught and they'd discover a bunch of Yanni CDs and katamari Damacy or Mario Kart in his apartment.
cheesoning: then we could finally put some kind of warning label on Yanni CDs.
gordonfrohman: or a bible
cheesoning: right

Brief Run-down Of Dialect

liquidindian: Nae lassies?
liquidindian: Fuk that
liquidindian: shite
liquidindian: etc

That's A Detailed Feel

liquidindian: I did watch Gerard Butler being interviewed by Craig Ferguson, which was quite fun for the 'how did we get here' feel of it.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Kind of Special

greenskpr: just wanted to get something kind of special and over the topish for the ladies
betaray: get them a 5g barrel of hard cider
gordonfrohman: do ladies drink a lot of guinness?
gordonfrohman: most I know stick to that wheat shit
greenskpr: I meant ralph


gordonfrohman: I cannot lower my stance on auto-tuning, even for science
gordonfrohman: some things are evil no matter how much good they do
betaray: Autotuning: superior, gordonfrohman: inferior
JDHarper: Wasn't Autotune the News enough to redeem autotune?
gordonfrohman: auto-tune. beat-boxing. homosexualty.

Donation Baskets Don't Rake In What They Used To

gordonfrohman: man my neck is in severe pain
gordonfrohman: and I woke up twice last night with no covers on me
gordonfrohman: stupid demonic presence
niteowl: just pony up the 20 bucks and get an exorcism already
gordonfrohman: nevar!
gordonfrohman: I'd have to clean the bathroom before we invited anyone over
gordonfrohman: and demons or no, I am NOT SCRUBBING THAT TILE
niteowl: well, you give it some time, your convulsions will clean that right up
niteowl: make sure to wear an abrasive shirt, though

They Are Also Terse

Faux Real: beta, true skeptics are tiresome at best
gordonfrohman: I don't believe that
niteowl: see?
betaray: I was amused :)
niteowl: SKEPTIC


Faux Real: does it have bill nye yelling the earth is a closed system?
betaray: Nye said that?
Faux Real: yeah
Faux Real: he yelled it a few thousand times
Faux Real: i wondered about the sun and tidal forces
Faux Real: but he kept yelling it
gordonfrohman: maybe he means earth doesn't expel waste
niteowl: insofar as matter, perhaps
niteowl: he couldn't have been talking about energy
niteowl: about energy
niteowl: about energy
niteowl: ENERGY!
niteowl: ENERGEY!
niteowl: talking about!
niteowl: ENERGY!@

You Can Do More Than 140 Characters, That Way

chundo: i don't use twitter
chundo: i just shout random things out my window


Faux Real: i think you are saved on my phone as john beta
liquidindian: That's a great Sci Fi name.
liquidindian: John Beta, Robot PI.
betaray: on the trail of the escaped Ultraslimp

Start... The Reactor....

Niteowl: hey, has anyone used biblio?
Niteowl: see i can get a book for a buck, is it really a buck? or a buck +4 dollars shipping?

Budget Chomsky

ralph: that's nothing, you wouldn't believe the bullshit I was taught in America
ralph: The phillipines asked us to come take over
ralph: There were very few indians and they didn't mind us because they had no concept of land ownership
betaray: America won WWII
betaray: The only people to contribute to society before 1950s were white and mostly male
Faux Real: the chinese who built the railroads did it out of a noble work ethic
betaray: Hawaiians wanted to join the union
Faux Real: our hemisphere needed protecting
betaray: Most people gave a shit about the revolution
Faux Real: united fruit was a bunch of nice philanthropists who's main motivation was improving infrastructure in honduras
betaray: being in texas I got to hear about how the civil war was about states rights
Cyrano: i think you mean The War of Northern Aggression.
Faux Real: my great aunt calls it the "recent unpleasantness"
Faux Real: how could anything called "school of the americas" be bad?
betaray: Another good one is that people left for "religious freedom" rather than getting kicked out for being religious fanatics
Faux Real: "we were founded by crazies"
ralph: Very few Americans sided with the british in the Revolution
ralph: and none of them have wasp descendants in government service
niteowl: Most Americans listen to the "World Police" song "America, FUCK YEA" and think it's being tongue in cheek
ralph: In AP US hist, we were each assigned a land grab or war and had to defend it
ralph: I drew the phillipines
ralph: and went with America FUCK YEA
ralph: it was all I had
ralph: zackaly
niteowl: you shoulda gone with 'corned beef, it ain't so bad!'
niteowl: 'just don't ask what bulut is'
ralph: I wanted to do a report on Smedley Butler
ralph: they put me down as a malcontent
niteowl: not a wrong choice, on their part