Pears

stresstwig: maybe this one was just really underripe, but i don't understand the hub-bub about pears
cobra kai: it's an awful lot of hubbub though. Word on the street is, pears are hot
stresstwig: i know, i keep getting all of these pages about pear futures
stresstwig: and then i have to find a payphone
stresstwig: it's a hassle
Niteowl: ?
Niteowl: if one of you makes a comment about my general body type vis a vis fruit, THAT"S A PADDLIN'
cobra kai: not asian pears though
cobra kai: whoops
cobra kai: stayed at a good hotel in southeast asia where they deliver a different, terrifying HR Giger inspired fruit every day.
cobra kai: something that looks like a green orange, open it, it's orange
cobra kai: a sea urchin containing stuff that tastes like raspberry
spruce: robotv vagina plums?
cobra kai: YES
cobra kai: they were fucking with me by the end
cobra kai: team of special effects guys cracking up in the kitchen as they sent the fruit of the day up
Katya: it was the guy from F/X, Bryan Brown
Katya: he was making new types of fruit for his attempt for a third F/X movie
cobra kai: wow, the remote control clown killed that franchise
Niteowl: what? the remote control clown IS THE FRANCHISE.
Katya: now if it was a remote control tentacle pineapple
Katya: that shit would have rocked
spruce: as long as you weren't fucking, with them
cobra kai: yes, in Bangkok I tend to go radically celibate and start considering religion
Niteowl: cobra kai: it's just called fruit there, ya lily white WASP boy
stresstwig: niteowl i kind of imagine you as a pineapple mixed with a steak
Niteowl: i'm a PINEAPPLE STEAK stresstwig
cobra kai: too hawaiian
cobra kai: you're rijstaffel with lychees
Katya: all ristaffel is delicious shut up
Katya: er rijstaffle
cobra kai: all of it looked like the end of watchmen, spruc nailed it
Katya: RICETABLE
Niteowl: huh, that looks DELICIOUS, but it's INDONESIAN, we HATE INDONESIANS. IT"S LIKE YOU AND PPL FROM JERSEY WHO SAY THEY"RE FROM NY
cobra kai: Izzard: the dutch speak four languages, and smoke pot. so there.
cobra kai: wow, I hate nobody. you racist.
Niteowl: i'm not racist
Katya: the first time i had rijstaffel was in amsterdam and i have never found its equal
Katya: so great
Niteowl: i just can't stand Syrians for no particular reason.
cobra kai: I've never found its equal
cobra kai: /princess bride
Niteowl: it's perfectly balanced?
Niteowl: damnit
spruce: what's rijstaffel?
cobra kai: malaysian lunch
Katya: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rijsttafel
***Niteowl pounds cobra kai with a faux-not-really-authentic pyramid merchandising keyring that says 'ALIENS WERE HERE" stamped on the side
Niteowl: damnit, now i need to read up on Egypt
cobra kai: me too
cobra kai: what the hell are those people up to
stresstwig: pyramid schemes
spruce: that sounds good
cobra kai: Syrian cabdriver in Abu Dhabi, guest worker in company housing with Egyptian roommates
cobra kai: ":look, no offense, but the egyptians they load up on tobacco and carbs and they just fucking TALK and TALK you know?"
cobra kai: pretty much nailed it
Niteowl: load up on CARBS?
cobra kai: you want to understand Egyptians, think of sesame street
Niteowl: he cares about their dietary habits
Niteowl: which ones are they? snufflelupagous?
cobra kai: yes, carbs. native dish is called kossheri--http://egyptian-food.suite101.com/article.cfm/kosheri_traditional_egyptian_dish if you eat it at dinner you have fuel for a marathon and you're up all night pacing
cobra kai: godawful--like a KFC famous bowl. Back to muppets.
Katya: man now im planning on going to a malaysian restaurant for lunch
Katya: mmmm
cobra kai: cool have the rijsttafel
Katya: they don't have that :(
Niteowl: i knwo cobra kai is baiting me, but like a well made IED<>
Niteowl: it must be all that lawyering
spruce: I don't know that there are any Malaysian restaurants in Austin. Hmmm. Indonesian, yes, but Malaysian I don't think so.
Niteowl: malaysian food is the only reason i'm even remotely proud of my heritage
cobra kai: the monsters on sesame street with the heavy eyebrows? poor organizational skills? Shout a lot? impossible to lead or be organized? totally harmless? that's egyptians
Niteowl: Coptic Christians? SWEET!@
spruce: And don't forget Sagat, niteowl. He's a great street fighter.
Niteowl: Sagat is from malaysia?
Katya: he's a cheap muthafuckah
Niteowl: thailand
spruce: hmf
Niteowl: Tiger, Tiger, UPPERCUT
stresstwig: goddamnit sagat