Perspective

Cyrano: you don't have a lawn. you have a glass-mined patch of dirt.
stresstwig: and a weird sort of torture alley with a giant metal door
ralph: wow. And batman had a "dank cave poorly suited to storing his electronics"
ralph: Superman had a "slip-and-fall-lawsuit waiting to happen."
ralph: kato kaelin had a "pool house near a murder site"
Cyrano: perspective is everything.